Friday, November 9, 2012

Give me a Hole

Give me a hole and stick my head in it!
I get up very early in the morning. Actually at 4am, get the woodstove going, put the dogs out, take care of over 125 animals, come back to the house, hang out last nights laundry and deal with issues of a family in the morning heading all different directions. If I drank coffee, I do not! I would be permentally drunk on the stuff.

Wednesday morning, as every morning went on as this with the exception I was going into the city with Dearest. To save on gas we have been doing this routine now for just about a year. He goes into the office I deal with the folks.

Back track three weeks ago. While I was grocery shopping with my Dat I spied my old girlfriend from high school down one of the aisle. She was a knock-out in high school and was still pretty as ever. My first response was to run up to her and hug her. Its been 30+ years since I saw her. Man we use to spend hours on the phone at night chatting away, lunches playing card games, sitting at high school sporting events. A lot ran through my mind in a few seconds. But Dat needed my help, and instead I dealt with duty rather then want. She was gone. My heart went through my feet.

This week when I got changed into my( 'work at my parents house so I can scrub their kitchen floor') skirt, threw my hair up in a bun, no make-up but thought I looked good enough ( well -anyway !).

In the afternoon on Wednesday I was in Fabricland getting fabric for daughters wedding and who should bump into me with her 13 year old son? The same friend. 

I was demobilized! Mortified.........oh my! What did I look like? I wanted to find a hole and throw my head in it. I smiled and greeted her son, ( the youngest of four boys I am told). Man she looked good for 50! Young and pretty as ever. I felt old and worn. I just had spent 5 hours with my folks, and three hours with barn yard animals. The emotions inside me were near tears. We spoke of our families. She gave her son a glowing report of me in high school............... but that was so many years ago now. I probably seemed like 100 years old to him ( you know how teenagers are about their parents). I just smiled. They were in there looking for wool. I had to chuckle because it was ovious she didn't sew or knit.No wool in this store, just fabric. I asked her what she needed wool for? She said mitts. I directed her to the right store and told her the best wool and what was on sale this week. She is still a space cadet! A pretty space cadet! 

I found out where she works and will go there one day when I'm looking real nice and we'll do lunch together.

In the meanwhile I had a teary session in the car. Getting old gracefully?


Buttons said...

Oh do not do that to yourself you have no idea if she is not thinking the same way. We never know what is really going on in others lives she may have been thinking you were the lucky one for reasons you do not know.
You can never judge a book by its cover.
Go for lunch for sure and I am sure after you talk you will see things differently. I have a old friend who I thought was so beautiful and Happy and we talked not long ago and she thought my life was perfect so you never know. We are all special and I think you are indeed special. HUGS B

Jane and Chris said...

We shouldn't judge another's appearance, we should only judge what is in their heart.
I know your heart is beautiful.
Jane xx

Tina Leigh said...

Is that not what always happens! The house is a mess & someone comes to visit! Someone needs a lift in your car & you can't find that smell that has something to do with what your granddaughter was eating when you picked her up from school a week ago! You run to the country store for a paper and your husbands ex wife opens the door for you!

Ha! And the list goes on and on! But that is life. We are not perfect or always at our best. And age.... Don't get me started on that! My boobs, my hips...and what the heck is happening to my eye lashes?!

But our husbands love us when we haven't brushed our teeth and our kids always think they have the prettiest mama in the world.

I've neve laid eyes on you but I think you have a unique life and a giving, respectful heart. That makes you beautiful in your boots with animal poop on the bottom (that's how mine look) with hair you should have washed yesterday (cuz that's how mine looks) and chiped nails and fine lines around the eyes (that's me).

A real woman!

Gill - That British Woman said...

I agree, when our house is picture perfect no one ever comes, as soon as it looks like a bomb has dropped everyone turns up

I agree with the others, appearance doesn't matter it's what's inside of you.


Anna said...

I can soooo relate to this post!!! I have had similar situations happen in the past, and I will admit, even now, I feel that way a little when I run into an old school mate. But one time, I just said to myself, "Hang it all! This IS me! I shouldn't have to dress up so people will think good of me. Either they like me the way I am or they don't." As I have grown older, I, myself, have noticed more and more beauty in the countryish, natural living people, and less and less in the "painted" people. It is all in the eye of the beholder, and what they think doesn't have anything to do with how I am or live. As long Dave can find me beautiful when I am wearing my slouchy sweats and covered with dirt (and he does, God love him!), then I don't care what anyone else thinks.
Just by reading what you write, I think you are GORGEOUS!!!

I like the way Tina Leigh put it.... it couldn't have been said better!

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